Be honest — you barely watched the middle innings.
Not because you don't love this team. Because the Nationals decided to speedrun the loss in the first inning and the rest was a formality. Their starter walked the bases loaded on three of the first four batters. Bohm singled one home. Stott walked one home. 2-0 before some of you even found the remote.
Final: 3-0. Wheeler dealt. Duran slammed the door. Everybody home by 10.
Zack Wheeler Is Still That Guy
Seven innings. Four hits. One walk. Zero runs. In September. At age "don't worry about it."
Wheeler has been the most reliable thing in this city for years and last night was just another Wednesday shift. No drama, no bullpen panic in the sixth, no "why is he still out there" discourse. Just an ace treating a September road game like a tune-up, because that's exactly what it was.
And then Duran comes in for the ninth, strikes out two, 1-2-3 inning, save number 31. When the bullpen is boring in the best possible way, that's when you know it's actually a good year.
Thirteen Walks. THIRTEEN.
Season high. The Phillies drew thirteen free passes last night.
Bohm went 2-for-2 with an RBI and walked THREE times by himself. Arraez doubled off the wall in the seventh and Harper scored from first because of course he did.
Look, part of this is Washington pitching doing Washington pitching things. But a lineup taking its walks in mid-September instead of chasing everything like it's a flight boarding call? That's the version of this offense that survives October. Patient, annoying, relentless. Be that team in three weeks and nobody in the NL wants to see us.
The Fun Part: Sunday in New York
Here's where it gets good.
The magic number for a playoff spot is down to 7, and the earliest the Phillies can clinch is Sunday — at Citi Field. Against the Mets.
Read that again.
Clinching a postseason berth on their field, in front of their fans, while they plan their October around fantasy football — there are gifts you ask for, and there are gifts the universe just hands you.
So keep stacking wins, keep drawing walks, and if you're not already figuring out where you're watching Sunday, what are we even doing.
Go Phils.
